Strange and wonderful things...
BMW M5.. keep that in your mind as I tell you this story.
So I'm walking to my sister's house, to go devour her food and use her WiFi, as I sometimes do every now and then. As I walk, I check my favourites in my call log.
So there's around four numbers that are constantly there, because of how often I call, two of which are Angie and Tumz. Those guys went abroad, but for some reason I don't know, (because I miss them) I keep calling their Kenyan numbers knowing for sure I'd hear the lady from safaricom saying
"The mobile subscriber cannot be reached."
One day I imagine, she's probably going to get tired and say
"Hey, we both know they won't pick up so stop wasting my golden voice which I go to great lengths...." And continue off in a rant telling me how she keeps her voice calm and steady making people think it was recorded when really...
I digress, so I call my two friends and the lady sounds the same as usual when I call Tumz. I call Angie waiting for the familiar pause before the good lady starts talking, and the phone actually goes through!
I hear the beep noises (that sounds every 3 seconds did you know?) and immediately stop in my tracks thinking Angie came back and didn't tell me, or, her mum will pick up and wonder why I'm calling her when I know she's away, then what would I say?
Instead I hear a woman with a thick luhya accent say
"Harakisha sema, Niko job" and I start thinking what I'm going to say to be worthy of this luhya lady's time.
In the background I hear someone yell,
"Caaaarrrrrooooootts ten bob" over and over again.
I ask her who she is and she tells me her name is Jacinta,
"How didn't you know who it was when you called? Who were you calling?"
"Umm, this was my friend's phone number a while back"
"Sorry, it's mine now," she tells me, sounding a bit like smeagol the gollum of Lord of the rings (My precious...)
I ask her what she does and she says business, Maybe she sells vegetables like the carrot man in the background, maybe it's clothes, maybe I've even bought something from her once.Maybe the carrot guy was staged and she's actually an owner of a chain of supermarkets.
She says sorry about my friend and tells me to look for my friend's current number and starts going on about how us youth need to know how to keep in touch without phones and she hopes it wasn't urgent.
I hang up after a bit, when I realise I really can't justify asking any more questions. Especially when Jacinta was at work. I send her some credit, my parting shot with the number I had crammed and called hundreds of times. Also because I started thinking maybe she's one of those persistent hawkers I keep ignoring and felt a bit guilty.
Now what will I do with the now useless information (her number) in my head? It's like being told that pi isn't actually 3.143 it's 17 and you now have a useless 3.143 in your head.
Now remember the BMW I told you to keep in your mind?(you guys probably forgot all about it) No need anymore. I just Jacintad you. Now you know how I feel and that was the point.
Anyway all this just led me to start thinking about the strange things that life has to offer, like sweat, it's literally stinky water coming out of our skin. Yuck, also shouldn't it be a bad thing that we're all leaking water. We're 70% water.
And if tomato is a fruit then ketchup is a smoothie! Isn't that weird? And siblings are people we once shared a womb with, so if you think about it, bread that shared the same oven are siblings. If you think about it, many things in this world are siblings.
And why is pink considered a female colour? It's a colour, why does it get attached to a gender when it's limitless? And the way guys can also rock pink. Pink is the new black guys!
Also if we think about sleep for example, why is sleep so weird? I mean we wear special sleeping clothes and lie comatose in comfortable soft places covered by a warm thick cloth and then we have vivid hallucinations stimulated by our semi-concious.
Yes yes, I know, I'm woke-ifying you guys with all this knowledge. Or I disappointed people who were waiting for a literary piece of work. I've had a really random week I'm sorry.. I promise next week's shall be amazing... Amazing! Lengen-wait for it-dary!! (Terms and conditions apply)
So I'm walking to my sister's house, to go devour her food and use her WiFi, as I sometimes do every now and then. As I walk, I check my favourites in my call log.
So there's around four numbers that are constantly there, because of how often I call, two of which are Angie and Tumz. Those guys went abroad, but for some reason I don't know, (because I miss them) I keep calling their Kenyan numbers knowing for sure I'd hear the lady from safaricom saying
"The mobile subscriber cannot be reached."
One day I imagine, she's probably going to get tired and say
"Hey, we both know they won't pick up so stop wasting my golden voice which I go to great lengths...." And continue off in a rant telling me how she keeps her voice calm and steady making people think it was recorded when really...
I digress, so I call my two friends and the lady sounds the same as usual when I call Tumz. I call Angie waiting for the familiar pause before the good lady starts talking, and the phone actually goes through!
I hear the beep noises (that sounds every 3 seconds did you know?) and immediately stop in my tracks thinking Angie came back and didn't tell me, or, her mum will pick up and wonder why I'm calling her when I know she's away, then what would I say?
Instead I hear a woman with a thick luhya accent say
"Harakisha sema, Niko job" and I start thinking what I'm going to say to be worthy of this luhya lady's time.
In the background I hear someone yell,
"Caaaarrrrrooooootts ten bob" over and over again.
I ask her who she is and she tells me her name is Jacinta,
"How didn't you know who it was when you called? Who were you calling?"
"Umm, this was my friend's phone number a while back"
"Sorry, it's mine now," she tells me, sounding a bit like smeagol the gollum of Lord of the rings (My precious...)
I ask her what she does and she says business, Maybe she sells vegetables like the carrot man in the background, maybe it's clothes, maybe I've even bought something from her once.Maybe the carrot guy was staged and she's actually an owner of a chain of supermarkets.
She says sorry about my friend and tells me to look for my friend's current number and starts going on about how us youth need to know how to keep in touch without phones and she hopes it wasn't urgent.
I hang up after a bit, when I realise I really can't justify asking any more questions. Especially when Jacinta was at work. I send her some credit, my parting shot with the number I had crammed and called hundreds of times. Also because I started thinking maybe she's one of those persistent hawkers I keep ignoring and felt a bit guilty.
Now what will I do with the now useless information (her number) in my head? It's like being told that pi isn't actually 3.143 it's 17 and you now have a useless 3.143 in your head.
Now remember the BMW I told you to keep in your mind?(you guys probably forgot all about it) No need anymore. I just Jacintad you. Now you know how I feel and that was the point.
Anyway all this just led me to start thinking about the strange things that life has to offer, like sweat, it's literally stinky water coming out of our skin. Yuck, also shouldn't it be a bad thing that we're all leaking water. We're 70% water.
And if tomato is a fruit then ketchup is a smoothie! Isn't that weird? And siblings are people we once shared a womb with, so if you think about it, bread that shared the same oven are siblings. If you think about it, many things in this world are siblings.
And why is pink considered a female colour? It's a colour, why does it get attached to a gender when it's limitless? And the way guys can also rock pink. Pink is the new black guys!
Also if we think about sleep for example, why is sleep so weird? I mean we wear special sleeping clothes and lie comatose in comfortable soft places covered by a warm thick cloth and then we have vivid hallucinations stimulated by our semi-concious.
Yes yes, I know, I'm woke-ifying you guys with all this knowledge. Or I disappointed people who were waiting for a literary piece of work. I've had a really random week I'm sorry.. I promise next week's shall be amazing... Amazing! Lengen-wait for it-dary!! (Terms and conditions apply)
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